Feeling your way through pregnancy after a loss

Pregnancy after a loss can be a challenging and emotional journey and you may feel a rollercoaster of emotions. But you are not alone.

You are not alone in this.

Pregnancy after a loss can be a challenging and emotional journey. You may feel a roller coaster mix of emotions during this pregnancy.. joy, fear, guilt, and grief. 

There is no right or wrong way to feel, and everyone’s journey is different.

Sadly, many of the couples I support are going through pregnancy after one or more miscarriages, you are not alone. 

From the experience of supporting these couples I have pulled together some thoughts and tips that may help you navigate your current pregnancy:

  • Seek support from your partner, family, friends, or a therapist who can listen and where you can talk openly about how you are feeling. 
  • Honor your previous loss in a way that feels meaningful to you, such as lighting a candle, writing a letter, holding a funeral or memorial or planting a tree.  But also try to celebrate your current pregnancy and bond with your baby as much as you can, such as talking to them, playing music, or keeping a journal. You are not betraying your lost baby by loving a new one. 
  • Remember that every pregnancy and birth is different and if something negative happened during a previous pregnancy it doesn’t mean that it will happen again. 
  • Take care of yourself physically (and this will have a positive knock-on effect for you mentally), such as eating well, getting enough rest, practicing relaxation techniques, or doing something you enjoy.
  • Get support to prepare you for this birth and new baby YOUR way.. and this is the reason why my courses and pregnancy and birth coaching sessions are tailored to your needs. For example, if we need to help your subconscious mind let go of some of the painful feelings or emotions to help you better prepare for this birth, then we can spend time working on that.

Remember that you are not alone, and there are many resources and communities that can offer you information, comfort, and hope.  I would recommend www.sands.org.uk and https://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/

Debbie Willis, Better Birth & Baby

pregnancy after a loss
pregnant with scan



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